People often ask me why I write romance and the first time someone asked, I have to admit I paused to figure out the reason. Of all the genre's I could have chosen, why had I picked romance without giving a second thought to anything else? Here is the answer I came up with.
Like most girls, I grew up watching and reading fairy tales. I played make-believe with my little girl friends, and no matter the day or scenario, it always included each of us having our own personal imaginary boyfriend, TV heart throb, or Prince to rescue us whenever pretend villains or some other form of disaster would strike. On the rare occasion an argument would ensue over a particular heart throb, the problem was easily solved by creating him a twin brother or two. We practically lived for that imaginary moment of rescue, that magical kiss, or that feeling of pure bliss knowing that this fictional man was at the ready to protect us, rescue us, or court us, all while remaining charming, handsome, and perfect.
And then I grew up and realized romance isn't always as blissful as portrayed on TV. It doesn't take long to decide that being tortured by a wicked witch and her spells might be way less painful than that first heartbreak over a guy you thought would be your one true prince. I also learned rather quickly that finding Happy Ever After is a little harder to achieve than simply making a wish. And.... I'd be lying if I said I'd never prayed for a Fairy Godmother, or at least the occasional use of her magic wand.
So why do we love to read romance? Maybe it's because it brings back those feelings of nostalgia from when we were kids. It helps us escape from the reality of modern romance, which is a far cry from old-fashioned fairytale romance. Old-fashioned romance seems to have been forgotten, and the loss has turned something as simple as dating into a nightmare. Standards have been lowered. Quality has been replaced with quantity. Heartfelt face to face conversations have been replaced by printed words and emojis. Serious relationships have been replaced by casual dating. Commitment and loyalty are harder to come by. And the worst part is that the lesson society is teaching us about love and romance now is that you may be better off if you don't care too much, feel too much, or say too much.
And speaking of nightmares.... those poor, unfortunate, single, souls, who ventured into the dark forest of online dating in search of Happy Ever After, may never be seen or heard from again. One might compare online dating to an evil spell cast on the single by the wicked Queen Ravenna, complete with a modern mirror to stand in front of and ask, "Mirror, mirror on the wall, who is the fairest, richest, and sexiest of them all?" Then suddenly choices appear before them to gamble their heart and soul on, while Ravenna stands in the shadows, cackling with delight at every wrong person they choose.
Gone are the days of men wooing women, and putting great effort into courting them with flowers and poems. There are fewer and fewer men choosing to keep up this tradition, and to those who do....bravo! They deserve a standing ovation. And trust me, they do exist. When you find one, you need to hold on to them with both hands and not let them get away. Because the truth is, the majority of women long to be adored. Most of us would give anything to have a man be intrigued by us and find us amazing, one who would treat us like we were his world and want to know everything about us. We want a man willing to listen to everything we say no matter how trivial it may be, and one who makes us feel like we are important. We want to look into his eyes and know without a doubt he cares about our wants and needs. And no matter which sex you are or which sex you are trying to attract, I think those same things hold true. We all just want to feel loved. So of course we turn to fiction when reality falls short. Reading romance creates hope that someday we will be as lucky as those characters to experience the same excitement and joy of being madly and deeply in love, or it allows us the chance to re-experience that whimsical enchantment of falling in love, all while distracting us from the disappointment of what romance has become.
In a perfect world, old-fashioned romance would be taught in school, or offered as a major at colleges around the country. Courses would include romantic lit, writing and reading poetry, effective listening, courtship 101, creative dating, learning to sing while playing the guitar, music composition, cooking, and the art of buying chocolate. Hey, a girl can dream. And wouldn't it be nice if more men snuck a peek at the romance books we read and took notes of what makes those fictional men so desirable? Yes. But since that will never happen, we can accept our men the way they are, love them, and be satisfied daydreaming of the ones dancing around on the storybook pages.
And this is where I come in. I wanted to be part of creating that magic by writing stories about romance that will make readers fall in love. Because let's be honest. There are few things better in life than experiencing fleeting moments of passion, joy, lust, and excitement. This can certainly be achieved with a real man, but also with a perfect man of our dreams that will only ever exist on paper. And everyone deserves to live a love story with a happy ever after.... even if it's only in a book.
Like most girls, I grew up watching and reading fairy tales. I played make-believe with my little girl friends, and no matter the day or scenario, it always included each of us having our own personal imaginary boyfriend, TV heart throb, or Prince to rescue us whenever pretend villains or some other form of disaster would strike. On the rare occasion an argument would ensue over a particular heart throb, the problem was easily solved by creating him a twin brother or two. We practically lived for that imaginary moment of rescue, that magical kiss, or that feeling of pure bliss knowing that this fictional man was at the ready to protect us, rescue us, or court us, all while remaining charming, handsome, and perfect.
And then I grew up and realized romance isn't always as blissful as portrayed on TV. It doesn't take long to decide that being tortured by a wicked witch and her spells might be way less painful than that first heartbreak over a guy you thought would be your one true prince. I also learned rather quickly that finding Happy Ever After is a little harder to achieve than simply making a wish. And.... I'd be lying if I said I'd never prayed for a Fairy Godmother, or at least the occasional use of her magic wand.
So why do we love to read romance? Maybe it's because it brings back those feelings of nostalgia from when we were kids. It helps us escape from the reality of modern romance, which is a far cry from old-fashioned fairytale romance. Old-fashioned romance seems to have been forgotten, and the loss has turned something as simple as dating into a nightmare. Standards have been lowered. Quality has been replaced with quantity. Heartfelt face to face conversations have been replaced by printed words and emojis. Serious relationships have been replaced by casual dating. Commitment and loyalty are harder to come by. And the worst part is that the lesson society is teaching us about love and romance now is that you may be better off if you don't care too much, feel too much, or say too much.
And speaking of nightmares.... those poor, unfortunate, single, souls, who ventured into the dark forest of online dating in search of Happy Ever After, may never be seen or heard from again. One might compare online dating to an evil spell cast on the single by the wicked Queen Ravenna, complete with a modern mirror to stand in front of and ask, "Mirror, mirror on the wall, who is the fairest, richest, and sexiest of them all?" Then suddenly choices appear before them to gamble their heart and soul on, while Ravenna stands in the shadows, cackling with delight at every wrong person they choose.
Gone are the days of men wooing women, and putting great effort into courting them with flowers and poems. There are fewer and fewer men choosing to keep up this tradition, and to those who do....bravo! They deserve a standing ovation. And trust me, they do exist. When you find one, you need to hold on to them with both hands and not let them get away. Because the truth is, the majority of women long to be adored. Most of us would give anything to have a man be intrigued by us and find us amazing, one who would treat us like we were his world and want to know everything about us. We want a man willing to listen to everything we say no matter how trivial it may be, and one who makes us feel like we are important. We want to look into his eyes and know without a doubt he cares about our wants and needs. And no matter which sex you are or which sex you are trying to attract, I think those same things hold true. We all just want to feel loved. So of course we turn to fiction when reality falls short. Reading romance creates hope that someday we will be as lucky as those characters to experience the same excitement and joy of being madly and deeply in love, or it allows us the chance to re-experience that whimsical enchantment of falling in love, all while distracting us from the disappointment of what romance has become.
In a perfect world, old-fashioned romance would be taught in school, or offered as a major at colleges around the country. Courses would include romantic lit, writing and reading poetry, effective listening, courtship 101, creative dating, learning to sing while playing the guitar, music composition, cooking, and the art of buying chocolate. Hey, a girl can dream. And wouldn't it be nice if more men snuck a peek at the romance books we read and took notes of what makes those fictional men so desirable? Yes. But since that will never happen, we can accept our men the way they are, love them, and be satisfied daydreaming of the ones dancing around on the storybook pages.
And this is where I come in. I wanted to be part of creating that magic by writing stories about romance that will make readers fall in love. Because let's be honest. There are few things better in life than experiencing fleeting moments of passion, joy, lust, and excitement. This can certainly be achieved with a real man, but also with a perfect man of our dreams that will only ever exist on paper. And everyone deserves to live a love story with a happy ever after.... even if it's only in a book.